The time after a party is over when everyone is piss drunk, and crazy, unthinkable things begin to happen. This display is especially funny to the sober people in the area.
"Dude, Tammy is so drunk right now! I can't wait to see the postgame show once we leave this party!"
One who is of the noblest fraternities on campus and is known for his high caliber of frattiness. An aristofrat is always sipping, always has a lovely lady at hand, and is the life of the party. Most aristofrats have catchy last names like, "Butler" or, "Ferrara". Some are also given fratty nicknames such as "The Sip King".
Guy 1: Hey do you see that guy over there wearing a velvet robe who is doing two beer bongs and has a gorgeous girl holding his solo cup?
Guy 2: Yea, that guy is a legendary aristofrat. They call him, "Tank".
A cafeteria speed date is comprised of three main steps:
1. Man/woman walks into a cafeteria/diner/eatery
2. Man/woman sits down with a person sitting alone
3. Man/woman has a conversation with that person as if on a date
Although awkward at first, this method of meeting people may sometimes be bold enough to work.
(Man sits down across from unsuspecting woman)
Man: "I know what you're thinking... But before you tell me to scram, I just wanna say that this is my first cafeteria speed date and you looked like you could use some company. What do you say?"
Woman: "(hesitates...) Uhh okay, I have a few minutes. What's your name?"
a lambskin condom for those unlucky guys who are allergic to latex
Dude, this girl wants my cock! Can I borrow a sheep cloak?
No, you loser. How about you go skin a lamb?
shoes that are dirty, old, and horribly scented
"Ok, now I'm ready for a jog now."
"Eww dude, what is on your feet? Take those trash buckets off. The stench of them is about to make my nose bleed."
shoes that are extremely old and trashed up, yet the owner insists on still wearing them
guy #1: "Hey man you ready to go?"
guy #2: "You're gonna wear those shoes!!??"
guy #1: "Yea what's wrong with them?"
guy #2: "Dude, look at your floppy mcdoppies! They look like they got dropped in a giant blender, sewn back together, ate by a dog, thrown back up by the dog, crapped on by babies, sanded with sandpaper, and beat up by mike tyson!"
a girl that is a 7 (which is a neutral pH level) out of 10 on the hotness scale.
"Hey man, that girl is pretty decent. What do you think?"
"Ehh... She's just another a neutch."